Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
