I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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