and my herpes radar will keep us safe
It was confusing and full of hummus
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
