u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
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