We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
