My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
