Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.

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(847): View more from Illinois

she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom

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(716): View more from New York

Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?

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(213): View more from California

I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus

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(248): View more from Michigan

See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...

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(334): View more from Alabama

Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.

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(509): View more from Washington

somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.

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(661): View more from California

just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking

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