worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
