i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
