Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
