i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
