we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
