I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize