Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
