The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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