like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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