I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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