For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
