so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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