You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
