I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
