Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
