I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
