i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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