Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
