i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
