well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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