I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
