Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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