It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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