I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
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