yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
