he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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