is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
