my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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