farters have to be the big spoon...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
