Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
