You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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