I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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