i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
