No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
