I am spending my child support on dildos
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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