She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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