Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
