whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
