Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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