What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
