Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
