i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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