I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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