I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
birth control should be required to get into college
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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