Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Randomize
